


Dear Moth

by Im_a_fangirl_of_the_Lord



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: This is for Motttlemoth, it's just a thank-you-letter, there is no real plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-30
Updated: 2019-05-30
Packaged: 2020-03-30 02:13:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19032646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Im_a_fangirl_of_the_Lord/pseuds/Im_a_fangirl_of_the_Lord
Summary: I wanted to thank a very special person.Probably, the most important author in the Mystrade Fandom, Mottlemoth, means so much to me and as I start a new part of my life now it felt like the right time to finally publish this.





	Dear Moth

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Mottlemoth](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mottlemoth/gifts).



Dear Moth,

I know this is unusual but I have to write my thoughts down. To be able to explain what is going on I have to take you a few years back in time. I want you to meet my 15 year old me. Well, not exactly. I don't want you to meet her, she was quite annoying but I'd like you to understand the concept of her.  
I felt different during this time. And I know it sounds like a cliche but let me explain. I was a closeted bisexual, lonely nerd with very few friends and family problems who had no idea why the f*** I was suddenly falling in love with one of my friends. I couldn't talk about all the nerdy or geeky topics in public because that would've started the bullying again.  
So I found a place in the internet where I felt home. The Sherlock Fandom gave me a basis to become the person I am today. And that's where you come into the picture.  
I slowly drifted into the Mystrade Fandom and wondered how the hell I got here. English was still very hard to learn for me and I wasn't interested in it yet. That changed quickly because of you. 

As my depression got worse, the interest in reading increased. The day I started to read East End Boy (the first time I read one of your stories) changed me. Sounds dramatic I know but it's the truth. There was not much time left between school, homework and family life but I somehow managed to read more than 20 chapters in one day. To be honest, I didn't sleep much. 

From then on I learned so much from your stories.

East End Boy taught me that mistakes are okay. They make you human. But also that you can be fucked up someday you'll find your special someone and that dark times will end one day or another.

Excultus helped me to end the struggle with my sexuality. Mycroft tried to fight against his own genetics, however any time he drank blood he felt better. Eventually, he accepted it and finally came to peace with it. I accepted it. I am bisexual and I am at peace now.

End Game showed me that fighting is worth it. To keep going, no matter how difficult it is, is worth it.

There are so many more examples and I could talk about each one but I should probably come to an end soon - ish.

In the course of the last 3 years I was at a point where I wanted to end my life more than once. And a few factors, a few influences kept me fighting. Believe it or not, you and your stories belong into this category.  
I always had a place to go to in my mind, when my sister was trying to starve herself to death or when my mom said that she couldn't go on in life any longer. I had a London in my head where Greg and Mycroft were struggling too. But they faught. And so did I.  
You gave me a place I could flee to when reality was unbearable, when problems seemed impossible and solutions too far away.  
You gave me hope and peace for a few minutes.

What I'm trying to say here is that your influence on others is huge. You give people a home and a safe haven. And I'm so, so, so unbelievably thankful for everything you did (without knowing so). 

My last words to you in this letter:  
Thank you for everything. Keep going. You're amazing. Never ever think you're not influencing somebody in a positive way. You're the best and I hope to someday be as an amazing writer as you are. 

With love from all my heart,  
Me


End file.
